Some Things Never Change...

I cannot wrap my head around double standards.

The glaring double standards are like flies. Just brush them away. The subtle ones are like mosquitoes. Kill them before they bite you. Black Chicago is full of the latter.

Sometimes, I have conversations with friends that just make me wonder, “Are we STILL on this?”

Take the other day. An old acquaintance called, and we exchanged the usual pleasantries about family. I was headed down another path when he commented; “ I don’t know what’s wrong with all of these so called middle class Black folk. Living in the suburbs. Sending their kids to these schools. They’ve weakened the best neighborhoods in the city, and trashed the public school system to boot by pulling out the best students…”

I have heard this most of my life, so I have a pretty thick skin. I listened.

“I mean, I grew up in the hood, and most of the middle class kids I knew had issues. Smoking, drinking, doing dope…That didn’t impress me. When I dropped out, I laughed at how many of those same kids went on to be class presidents or something, knowing they spent a summer in rehab. I mean, when I run into them downtown now, attorneys, physicians, and the like, I wonder: if only people knew you smoked reefer when you were fifteen. You ain’t no better than me…

“I kinda hoped with an Obama presidency, these silly people would wake up. This man is what can happen if we stick to our communities and stop trying to be like the white man.”

I timidly ventured that Mr. Obama was raised by his white grandparents…

“Yeah, but he married a black woman and his kids…”

His kids went to one of those bourgie private schools. The University of Chicago Lab School. His wife was on the board. Now they go somewhere that runs about $28K a year…

“Still, he’s a brotha who thinks like…”

He’s a multimillionaire. I don’t think the man has ever lived in a ghetto in his life. He and his wife are Ivy League grads. Why is it OK to support him but not parents who want to give their kids the same opportunities?

Wait a minute…weren’t your two boys in private schools in the city?

“Yeah, I didn’t have any choice…the best public schools have long waiting lists. The local schools are too wild. They wouldn’t be that way if people hadn’t moved to the suburbs…”

Where do you have them again?

He mentions two schools, midway down the list of ranked privates, but better than his area schools, without a doubt.

“The best the city has to offer…”

Aren’t you confusing the best you can do with the best there is? C’mon, now.

“Regardless, man, my kids need a shot. Again, if people like you hadn’t left, trying to live out integration…”

Did I leave? Last I checked, my formative years were spent in the boonies. Besides, why should my boy have less than the chance that I got?

“Still. By you remaining out there and having your kid in a private school out there, you are weakening the city school system. Besides, your boy has you. Other kids need the opportunity he may get because they don’t have an active father.”

Now being a good dad is a detriment? Why me? Why not the Chicago principals who shoehorn their kids into the best magnet schools then send them to elite private prep school thereafter?

“You just don’t understand.”

Why is this still an issue in 2009?

“Because this is what is, man. This is what is always going to be.”

Indeed.