Generation X Got This

Funny thing. There are tons of quotes on social media touting how my generation, that group born between 1965-1980, is ready for sheltering in place. We can handle a shutdown, one reads, because we were latchkey kids, we entertain ourselves, and our parents were so self-involved that we learned to live without love.


Somehow, the fact that for all our brilliance (and I do believe we are probably the smartest and most creative generation thus far) has not led to much in the way or worldly accomplishment is lost on us. We may work as lowly government clerks while boasting multiple graduate degrees, but dangit, we can handle a crisis. Generation X got this. We know how to hunker down and survive. We have the old issues of Soldier of Fortune to prove it.


I am inclined to agree with the memes. I am equally inclined to guess we will never get a chance to

A generation of young men, raised during the tail end of the Cold War, doing the last millennium equivalent of binge watching a number of movies about commandos, foreign takeovers and the occasional bad sci fi flick…our times truly prepared us for what we are now experiencing.


“OK, I’ve got that mag lite you guys got me for my last birthday. I just bought new batteries for it. How are we on water?”


“Um, we have the usual amount of the Hinkley delivery water…”


“Triple that order. Until then, I’ve added water purification tablets to the Amazon cart…”


“Um, ok…sounds expensive…what about boredom?”


“There are two thousand books in this house…and we have multiple candles should we have to read at night.”


“Sounds like a fire hazard. Can’t we just turn on the lights when it gets dark? Does a virus affect the electricity?”


“There could be a strain on the power grid. We have to be prepared.”


“Wow.”


“If the food supply gets low, there’s still the river. We can fish. We’ll survive.”


“When was the last the last time you cleaned a fish? Thirty years ago? You know, Sharks up the road is still open, they have a fish special this week.”


“How about for defense? I’ve always said we should have guns in the house. Now we see why. We’re caught with our pants down on that one. Luckily, I’ve got that old machete by the bed, the camping axe, and my Swiss Army knife…”


“The cops seem to still be making their rounds. This is a pretty quiet neighborhood…”


“We have to prepare for if they can’t be there. As far as supplies, we need more freeze-dried stuff…”


“I ordered Almond milk. The baby wants ramen.”


“Why can’t you all take this seriously? We may be indoors together for a month! Do you know what could happen?”


“Yeah. The dog gets tired of us being here during times when he normally has the place to himself, and starts attacking our shoes? I got him some new toys.”


“Fine. Fine. We need to plan how we will spend our time. This could change the way we do everything. We’ll spend more time together…telling stories…singing songs…”


“Are Netflix and Spotify paid? You put the subscriptions on the new card, right?”


“I’ve plugged in my scanner so we can pick up first responder bands…”


“There’s an ap on our phones that lets us listen in…”


“Mobile phone? What if your battery dies?”


“Umm, isn’t your scanner plugged into an outlet?”


“I’m ordering gas masks on Amazon. Should be here by November…”


“There’s a box of N-95 masks in the pantry from when I volunteered at the hospital.”


Oh.


Thankfully, only one half of the X population spent its Saturdays watching “Red Dawn” and the like all those Saturday afternoons. The other half were working on growing into practical adults, I guess.


We should ride this out just fine. The women of Generation X are in control, and the rest of us will
probably survive as an result.